Another Ride on the Coaster of Adoption

We hit another bump in the road. I’m frustrated. I’m pissed off. I’m devastated. I’m worried about what’s going to happen. I have no idea how to make sense of this for Rinat. I know life has no guarantees but haven’t we had our fair share of dealing with difficult, life altering decisions? Aren’t we done yet? Apparently not. Adoption is like playing a card game with a bunch of 3 year olds. They make the rules, tell you some of them, and then change them with no warning so that just when you think you have won the game, they tell you that there’s some unspoken rule that you didn’t follow and you have to keep playing with no idea of how to win. It’s impossible to know how to actually come out ahead so you just keep laying down your cards and hope they are the right ones. All that I can hope is that we will finally win a hand this time next week. Only time will tell. I know this post is cryptic and only my wonderful and supportive and compassionate family and friends know what I am talking about. I just ask that you put some good vibes out into the world that things will go our way. We are leaving for Kaz next week and are hopeful that we will meet a child to join our family. And if we don’t then we come home and we start over. As my sweet husband said last night, “We’ll have another baby one way or another because I don’t know anyone who’s more stubborn that you.” He knows me well :)
Go give your kids a big hug and tell them how happy you are to have them. love, - m