Sunday, October 30, 2016

Nov 2014

Hi all,
Aibek asked me on the way home from school today, "Mama? Do you and daddy lub me and Winat?"  Of course We do honey. Do you love me and Daddy? "I love you all day long." and then he burst into song- “skinamarinkidink skinamarinkidink do. I love you. I love you in the morning and in the afternoon..."  Guess I know what they did at school today. Love that kid. 



Mama Muffins hair salon.
It's not often that Rinat wants to take a bath with Aibek these days but ever once in a while they do and it's just so darn cute. I always loved when Rinat would want me to take one with him because I felt like it's what he did instead of snuggling. It was a way for us to be together in a way that was close but not confining if that makes sense and I just loved it. We would play with the toys and pour water over each other’s heads. Well, Bek has always been a big snuggler but never wanted me in the bath with him. But Rinat is a different story. He loves it when Rin agrees to get in there with him.  They play hair salon, shoot each other with water guns, and play with the little people and animals. It's cute to watch them bond in this way. 



My heart breaks for this little boy who has come so far but who is still struggling. He has started speech again.  And I have been noticing some motor skills that he is lacking so I see some PT in our future. Rin has had his own challenges. His of course were not language related or motor skills in need of help but he struggles with sensory issues and has trouble controlling his emotions. These boys have such different needs and it is so hard to see them struggle. But I feel so fortunate that we have all these resources at our disposal. And the money to pay for them. And the time to spend driving around to appointments. And the energy to support the therapists. And a strong marriage so we can get the support that we both need as parents so that we can support our kids and give them the best life possible.  So while we all struggle with our own needs, I feel so lucky that we are the team that we are and the supportive people we have around us. 




Things are just motoring along.  The kids are learning new things and we are just doing what we do.  Rin is having a great year and is enthusiastic about going to school every day.  He is working hard and becoming so responsible.  He does his homework without me even asking and reminds me when I forget to sign his sheet.  This big boy of mine (he's up to my shoulders!) is just so amazing and I am just beside myself with how grown up he is these days.  I mean, don't get me wrong he's not perfect.  He loves nothing more than to run around like a maniac screaming and playing sports all day long with his friends but he is also getting some satisfaction out of doing a good job at school too and I am so glad.  He has even started to get into reading books.  He has always enjoyed nonfiction and learning about sharks or dinosaurs or whatever his latest thing is but he is now getting into stories like "How to train your dragon".   One morning when Peter was gone early, Rin creeped into my room and crawled in Peter's side of the bed with his book and just sat there reading until I was fully awake.  I have gotten so much enjoyment during my life out of reading a good book and I am glad to know that he is enjoying it too.  When you read, you can go wherever it takes you, make a new friend, explore a fantasy land or go on a adventure all without leaving the house only for the cost of the book (or for free from the library!).  I take a book wherever I go and I am not ever for a single second bored, irritated that I have to wait at the doctor's office, lonely at home alone, or anything.

Bek is also working hard at school and has started saying things like "war rhyme with roar" which I am so happy to hear him saying.  Sometimes with his speech issues, I have a hard time knowing what he understands and what he doesn't.  I think he knows way more than I give him credit for.  At his conference, I asked about him learning the letters and how he doesn't seem to know that many yet.  Well, his teacher pulled out the cursive box of letters and he went to town on them- he even got B which I think is pretty hard (and mostly looks like L to me).  I am glad to know he's learning at school.  I mean, I know they adore him but I want to make sure he's learning too.  

Rinat telling me his friends all want to have playdates at our house bc it's more fun and their house is boring.  I wonder if that means that I am a slacker parent and let them do stuff I shouldn't or just that I give them to freedom to be kids and make mistakes.  We don't have a huge house or million electronics or anything fancy but they love it here for some reason.  And I love our tiny imperfect house for that reason too- it makes our kids happy and really what more could we want?

This big boy of mine is turning out to have so much compassion. I wasn't feeling well and he just went about taking care of his brother and asking me if there's anything I need. He didn't complain or anything. "Poor mom. I hope you feel better soon." And he also made breakfast the last few days. Toast w cream cheese, yogurt for him and cereal for Aibek. He is a great kid. He has such a loving heart. 

His new football cards and how he was so excited. He organized them by team and put rubber bands around them all. He's so cute. 

Then we had a combo TGiving and Baptism at the lakehouse and poolhouse.
We scrambled to get out of town ahead of a snowstorm rapidly approaching with guesstimates of 3-6". Once we were on our way and it started to come down, "It looks like Alaska. " came from Rinat in the backseat. But we got there safe and sound to meet up with everyone. 
Lazy morning and lots of coffee. Lots of cooking, Cousins playing, relatives eating, going to bed fat and happy.
Friday was more of the same- lazy morning, cousin time, taking a family walk, way too much wine and staying up way too late in the night and regretting it the next morning when the kids were up bright and early.



Saturday was a rush rush rush to get ready for the baptism and it was lovely.  I have made no secret of the fact that I don't subscribe to any particular religion but it was a really sweet ceremony.  All 22 children and 50 adults enjoyed it I think (yeah, I know- crazy number of people).  The first family walked in the door and my sweet boys took their job as host seriously "Hi, I'm Aibek, wanna come to my room and play?" and led them all off to show them all of the treasures hiding in his backpack.  And Rin too was absolutely in heaven (no pun intended) having all those kids in GigiMar's house.  They, as usual, jumped right into immediate friendships with whoever would play with them.  I love that.  





Despite the fact that I was 99% sure one of my children was going to misbehave (despite the promise of dire consequences if they did) they did well.  The ceremony started with the minister talking to the kids about the meaning behind baptism.  They sat in front of the table listening to what he had to say.  And then it was time for the water.  First came Ingrid and when the minister put held her down close to the bowl, she stuck her chubby little hand in the water bowl and splashed around a little bit.  Cute little thing.  Then was Bek and he did great- he stood still and listened and didn't yell anything at all inappropriate to my immense relief.  And finally little Anna Grace.  She's at that age.  You know, the one where the worst thing in the world is to be more than 2 inches away from mom?  Well, she made sure everyone knew she wasn't super happy about being passed from mom over to godmother Kate but in the cutest way possible.  The kids all did great.  



The children's dinner was adorable- each place setting had a flashing snowglobe and they were super excited about it.  And about the cupcakes.  Finally, with kids running around like maniacs and beginning to melt down, families trickled back out the door and on their merry ways.  The house got quiet again, we all took off our shoes, and dug into dinner ourselves.  

Another- and this one extra special- holiday done.  

Love to all, -m

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