A Thankful Mother

Happy (late) Mother’s Day everyone! I was organizing some papers in my office today and came across an email from a friend of mine sent on the day that our last IVF cycle didn’t work expressing her disappointment. I remember being so upset at that time in my life but today I was kind of surprised when I remembered it because I see it in such a different light now. Instead, I see the end of IVF as a beginning to my life as a mother for Rinat. If it had worked, I never would have known this amazing little bundle that I am so lucky to call my son. And so, on this Mother’s Day I give thanks. I am thankful for each and every step that brought me to him- the good and the bad. I never thought I’d be glad for it, but here I am finally glad that it happened. If not for all of the horrible times, I might not have come to know this amazing lovable little person who has come into my life. So, in honor of Mother’s Day, I give you a list of things that I love about being his mom:
I love when he puts his head on my shoulder and I can feel his soft hair on my cheek, when he helps me empty the dishwasher and is so proud of himself, that he does things just to make me laugh like giving me ‘big eyes’ and pretending to eat my toes, that he STILL loves to play peek-a-boo, that he is getting so independent but still wants my help, that he imitates me stretching in the morning and brushing my teeth at night, that he leads me around by a finger laughing that he has such control, I love our time in the morning and at night when he snuggles his nekkid little body into my lap, I love his excitement over a stick, caterpillar, or acorn, that he is genuinely interested in watching the lady bag groceries at the store, that he tells me when it’s time for bed by putting his hand next to his head and pretending to snore, that he consoles me when I cry, that he would rather play with me than any other toy in the house, that he is cautious with his older friends and comes to me when he’s unsure of what to do, and that he happily leaves me behind once he gains his confidence, I love his warm weight on my back when he’s in the carrier, when he will stop what he’s doing to turn around to give me a quick hug without being asked and then immediately turn back to what he was doing like he just couldn’t help himself, that he finds beauty in every single day and makes me do it too. And most of all I love that there is something new to love about him each and every day that I know him. On this mother’s day, I feel so honored and so incredibly lucky to be a mother to this amazing little person.
And, as a Mother’s Day gift to myself, I have started the application process to become a mother twice over. I can only imagine that the amount of love I feel will just grow with another baby joining our family. We never know where life will lead us, and I know the process will take a bit longer this time, but I am hoping to bring home a sister for Rinat sometime in the next two years. Round 2 has begun! Happy Mother’s Day to everyone out there. Much love -Rinat’s Mom