August 2013- Goodbye to my dad, Hello to the school year

Hi all, 

This month, as I was down in Lynchburg celebrating the upcoming arrival of our niece, I found out that with the happy comes the sad.  I got the call that we lost my father.  He had Alzheimer’s and had been sick for a while so I think in the back of my mind I knew it would come eventually but it is never easy to hear that someone you care about is gone.  Since then I have been trying to remember the good times that we had on our sailboat when we were little and going to Fin&Feather when we were older so I don’t forget them.  And most especially I will try to remember when he came to meet our oldest, Rinat, when he was a toddler.  He was really good with him and I am happy that I got to see that.  Losing someone is always sad but we are all looking forward to seeing everyone at the service down in Texas in September.  It’s been way too long since I’ve been down there and it will be good to see my roots and show my kids where their grandpa grew up and be able to say goodbye. 

But of course life must go on and kids must be entertained so our month was still full.  August is a slow month at the pool.  Not only is it vacation month for a lot of people anyway, but it’s also when congress and everyone who works with them is on vacay so the pool was completely empty.  One day it was literally just me and the boys and a couple of senior citizens doing laps and Bek was having a blast jumping off the side and swimming to me and the life guard asked “Does he want to jump off the diving board?”  I said “I dunno.  You want to Bek?”  Um, YESwas the reaction so we trotted on over with the life guard who must have been bored out of his mind and I showed Bek how to walk out and put his toes at the very end and then jump in.  He followed behind and it took just the smallest bit of prodding from me in the water below him and that kid jumped.  Zero fear.  He went so far under that I could see his little arms doing breast stroke under water to get back to the top and when he came up and caught his breath, out of his mouth came “My do it ‘gain?!”  So he did it again.  And swam to the side mostly on his own this time.  “Again?”  Yup.  By then, Rin had spied what we were doing and was amazed that is little brother could jump off.  “You can too,” I told him.  “Really?”  “Yes, really.”  So he did.  It took a little more prodding (my sweet careful big boy who sometimes worries too much) but he did it.  The power of sibling competition is an amazing motivator.  And they jumped off that board until they were so tired that their little legs were shaking.  The rest of the summer, they asked if they could jump off the board but sadly, our friendly lifeguard had gone off to college and none of the high school guards would let them (they hadn’t passed the swim test yet).  Next year, kids, next year.  You guys will be jumping fools.   

And there was lots of playing at the park and outside too to eke out the last bit of summer vacation and although I don’t love DC in August, the heat and humidity doesn’t bother them one single bit.  Give them a hose to play with or a Popsicle to eat and they are happy to be out there all day long.  And I just love when they spend the morning out there.  I inhale the scent of my boys after they come in from the backyard.  I never really understood the obsession with baby smell- they just smell like diapers and throw up to me- but the smell of summer?  I can't get enough of it.  They could bottle it and I’d use it for perfume.  And they love the outdoors.  They play back there for hours, them and the neighbors- digging holes, playing soccer, who knows what else?  The perfect little boy life.  

And the last two weeks of summer, Rin went to outdoor adventure day camp and he is absolutely loving it.  I mean, he comes home from being at camp for 8 hours and is still raring to go.  Rock climbing, kayaking, fishing, river exploring, making salsa, canoeing, orienteering, horseback riding. The first day I was a little bit sad to send my boy off to camp.  It's rare that he is nervous but then there's every once in a while when he turns shy and my heart just breaks a little bit.  He usually seems so mature but every once in a while I catch a glimpse of little boy in him.  I always know that it's going to be OK but it's like I have to feel the nervousness right along with him- like I can take a little bit of it on myself and take a little bit off him although I try to hide is as much as I can.  I do feel fortunate that my kids are generally outgoing and happy to be around new people.  They have something that I never had and I’m so glad.  Bek tells me he wants to go next year too but I'm not sure I can let him- because of me, not him.  He's getting big though so I guess I have to let go at some point.  

There are some times when I wish I could just push pause so I could make the moment last just a tiny bit longer.  As Rin's camp bus pulled up to the drop-off spot for today (the last day of camp for the whole summer) the windows were open, the kids mud-covered and happy and they were singing the camp song at the top of their voices.  The driver didn't open the doors until the last verse had been sung, the last little voice petered out.  It was like a movie and I wish that it actually was one so I could go back and replay it again and again.  It filled me with happiness that my boy gets to do those things.  That he gets to have the kind of experiences that have him jumping off the bus and talking about his day until he goes to bed.  Literally hours go by and he will still say "Oh yeah, and then we got to..."  Hearing his happiness just makes me so happy.  I can't wait until he can go to sleepaway camp because I think he will absolutely love it but at the same time I am so sad to think about it because it means that I don't get to hear about every single little detail of his day and what they did and who said what and where they went.  I’ll have to find some way to pry it out of him.  Maybe if I gave him a journal…

This month, while Rin was camp-ing it up, Bek and I headed over the Harper’s Ferry to meet up with the cousins for a picnic and some hiking.  I love that although we don’t get to see them as much as we’d like, we do get to see them and it’s always right back to where we were when we were last together.  I guess that’s what family’s about.  

And then it was back to school time. 

Rin was super excited about the first day and is really excited to have some of his friends that he knew from last year.  He had just a tiny bit of nervousness but mostly just excitement. 

Bek was excited too about school and he barely even looked back to wave goodbye as I was leaving him the first day- even though he moved up to the big kid class.  He potty trained himself in Costa Rica and thank goodness because he had to be trained to start school this year.  And that’s not all that they learned in CR.  Ever since CR Rin has been into trying new foods- casaba melon, radishes, nashi. The power of a good vacations lasts long after you get back.  But I am happy that my little one is not completely independent.  I still get to hear “My miss you mama” when I went to pick him up from his first day of school.  And he tucked his little head into the nook of my neck.  “My lub you.  You nice.”

After we picked up Rin from his first day of school we went to the park for a couple of hours and I just love that it was completely packed with kids.  I love that about living where we do and being walking distance to school- we just hop right on over to the park and meet up with all our buds.  Rin loves it and I do too. 

And what did I do with my first day of school?  Laundry mostly.  And dishes.  And email.  But the thing is- I got to do it without having to stop every two seconds to help someone go potty or break up an argument or get someone a glass of water or answer a million questions about everything under the sun.  I thought about my boys all day long but it sure was nice to have a few hours of quiet.  This Mama looooves school.

Love to all, -m    

July 2013- Costa Rica

Hi all,

So this summer, we took a long anticipated trip to Costa Rica and

it 

was

AMAZING. 

Waking Rin up at 4:45 to tell him it was time to go to Costa Rica put a huge smile on his face and was the perfect start to an incredible trip. He was immediately wide-awake and he was so excited that he wanted to go wake up Bek.  So we let him hug his little brother awake. So sweet this little kid excitement. I am hoping we get to do lots of gigs like this over the years while they are young enough to want to actually be around us. It’s worth every penny we scraped up.

At takeoff I could feel the excitement emanating off Rin- he was practically buzzing with it. He was excited about the plane and about Costa Rica and about what we were going to see and do and where we were going to go and who we were going to meet…  He just couldn’t talk fast enough.  Bek's comment as we took off was " It just like Star Wars!"  I don’t think that kid really got where we were going, he thought the plane WAS the adventure.  Little did he know.

 We got there safe and sound and the drive to the hotel sans car seats was a thrill for Aibek as we went around each corner- like riding a roller coaster.  It’s the first time he hasn’t been strapped in since KStan and he would throw his little arms up and say “Wheee!”  The cabbie thought he was hilarious and I’m pretty sure he took some extra tight turns just for kicks.   

We got to our gorgeous room set into the side of the hill and didn’t even stop to unpack but just ran straight down to the beach to get the lay of the land.  There was sand so black it looked straight from the volcano that made it. And it was soft too. The bay where the hotel is located is just flat out stunning with gorgeous mountains dropping down to quiet lapping waves and clear clear, amazingly clear, water. We explored and did some swimming and checked out the pool (and the daiquiris) and had dinner but after our early wakeup call it was off to bed exhausted, and snuggling with my boy all night right after.

 Almost too excited to eat the next morning, the boys were off exploring the rocks in the a.m. Aibek was sort of excited about he hermit crabs- that is until I let out a small yelp and dropped one because it came out of its shell while I was holding it. Then he was a little less into them. He wanted to stay far far away from them after that as a matter of fact.  Rinat though was 100 percent into the rocks and trying to figure out what lived in each little crevice.  The tiny little crabs, fish, and other things were very exciting for these two little boys to see.

And then thank goodness we finally saw some real wildlife. On the way to breakfast the following day we spied a family of spider monkeys up in the trees. There were two small ones and two that were bigger. It was what I'd been hoping for.  Not animals in a zoo, safely behind glass but out in the open the way they really live.  And it was marvelous to see.  Aibek in particular was enamored with them and it wasn’t until a hungry Rinat dragged us away that we headed down to get something to eat. 

They have great juice here which I had remembered from our last trip and it is just heaven for Rin who is our big fruit lover. Every mango strawberry passion fruit agua fresca thing he tries, he takes a sip and declares it "very tropical" just like he was tasting a good Bordeaux.  He’s so darn cute.  One of the things that I love about travel is that it takes you out of your everyday routine and opens people up to new experiences.  For instance, Rin has developed a taste for calamari in CR.    

I don’t know if I even need to tell you this but everywhere we go our boys make friends. People just love Aibek for his goofball personality and then Rinat comes into the mix and they are wowed by the depth of his knowledge. We met a family today and Rinat was right on the level of their 20 something year old and his love of the TV show River Monsters. They talked for a while about it and discussed their favorite sharks, which fish is the best. All of it.  But the best are the shuttle drivers.  The hotel is scattered around the hillside and so there are these guys that just drive around picking people up and dropping them off wherever they want to go.  These guys are just so nice to our boys.  They all are somehow able to make this bird sound using their hands and the boys have been trying to imitate it but with no luck.  But they keep on trying.  And there are no grumpy guys in the bunch.  Every time they stop for us, they call out “Hola!” and as we get off, instead of adios, Aibek will say “HolaHola!” and so the guys have started saying the same.  Adorbs.

Then in the afternoon, we took a little hike around the grounds and saw (well, heard) what I had been hoping to and I had told the kids about.  The very impressive call of Howlers.  These animals let out a call that could rival the roar of a lion in its ability to strike fear in anyone who can hear it.  To say it’s impressive is an understatement.  The sound just travels far and all of us where frozen in place, silent, while this group moved thought the trees.  No one said a word (not even Rinat the talker, not even Aibek the active 3 year old) until they had moved off into the distance and the spell was broken.  It was amazing.  And we also saw these cool wasp nests.  I’m not sure if they are dangerous but I am glad I have a big zoom lens I didn’t have to find out.   

The following day, we hopped on a big bus and drove to the river to take a “cruise”- and I mean in the most rudimentary way- and it was amazing. We drove through the small town of Filadelphia (hey two different Philly’s in just a couple of weeks!), and then on to farmland, and kept driving into the forest, to a quick stop at the banos. Even the bathroom was exciting.  There were hundreds of mangos lying under the trees and iguanas noshing on them like it was no big deal. The kids loved it.  Then we hopped back on and drove another ten minutes down to the river to get on a boat that was the movie version of what a Central American riverboat should look like- the rickety dock, the covered top, the water up the sides of the boat close enough that a snake could climb right in if it wanted to.  The water swirled under it so opaque that I would not have been able to see my hand in front of my face had I been in there. But of course we didn't go in there or ever stick our hands over the side of the boat because of the horror stories the guide had told us in the hour long drive there- children getting their hands bitten off, men getting dragged to their deaths. All kinds of fun stuff.  But who had time to worry about that when there was so much to see?  Rinat had insisted on bringing a whole backpack full of ‘supplies’ and I didn’t fight it but once we got on the boat, he busted out his journal and pencil to record everything he saw (I LOVE that!).  But he could barely keep up there were so many.  There were bats, both green and black iguanas, Nicaraguan birds, howler monkeys, capuchin monkeys, basilisk (Jesus Christ) lizards, herons, and Rin's favorite- a croc. A cornucopia of wildlife.  To my disappointment no toucans but I wasn’t disappointed- how could I be with all that?  On the bus on the way home, I asked Aibek his favorite part to which he replied " the boat" and then he sacked out cradling a bag full of Costa Rican BBQ Fritos chips while Rinat happily munched his way through some very sour lime ones and informed me that it was all great. All in all a fabulous experience. 

And the next day it was more of the same.  There were coati and a giant black iguana on the way to breakfast. Then Peter took the boys off for a morning of fishing. They were promised dorado, mahi-mahi, tuna, snapper, maybe even a sailfish.  

Since I get motion sickness, I had time to myself to relax and I didn't really know what to do. Now when I have time away from the kids, it passes so slowly and I don't remember how to sit still and relax. Will I ever remember how again? I used to be really good at it. But now I find myself getting bored after reading for an hour. I miss the action of having little ones around. I miss the constant barrage of thought that they just have to share out loud with whoever will listen. What will I do when they turn into big kids who don't need that so much anymore?  Maybe I’ll have to discover a hobby. 

But back to the here and now. 

The fish that they caught on their trip?  Well the chef cooked that tuna and mackerel right up for us all and we had it for dinner.  And I wouldn’t have cared if it was terrible (it wasn’t, it was good) but the look on my son eating the fish that he had caught with his very own hands was pretty amazing.  Bek, however, was a little bit less enthusiastic about the whole fishing thing in general they tell me.  He didn’t like the boat so much and the fish freaked him out.  Especially when it started jumping around in the cooler.  He wasn’t a fan.  But he had no trouble eating it once it was all cooked up.        

The next day- our last- was a day of just relaxing and hanging out. We saw several iguanas around the pool and Rinat very bravely fed them bananas. At lunch we had a wonderful Costa Rican meal of squirrelfish, rice and beans (gallo pinto), chayote, plantain and it was the best of the entire time we were there. We fed some to the iguana who was begging like a dog at the table once he saw his friend was back.  At lunch I asked, “So Rinat do you like Costa Rica?” and his response was the best part of the entire whole week.   

“It's everything I dreamed of.”

Sha-BAM.  Now THAT’S what vacation is all about.  A little boy’s dreams come true.

And then it was back home and the kids were less than stellar at the airport and not great for our long day of travel but who could blame them?  It was time to get home.  Aibek asked on our layover in Miami, "Mama, my sleep mine Piduh Man sheets tonight at mine new house?" Yes honey we will be back in our comfy cozy house soon. And we will all sleep the sleep of relaxed vacationed satisfied people tonight. And tomorrow it's back to the trenches. And back to washing lots of black-sand covered clothes for Mama.    

Oh…and apparently a giant scorpion too.  Yup, that’s right.  That was in my laundry basket.  Yikes.

Love to all, -m