Wednesday, April 9, 2014

September 2014- Ted and Texas

Hi all,
To start the month, Ted and family came in town for Liz’s sis’s wedding and they stayed with us which was tons of fun.  The boys made a big fort to sleep in in the basement and they were really excited to have a four day sleepover with their cousin. 




And we had fun just hanging out.  We went to the park, hung out at the house, and they just generally ran around like a bunch of maniacs.  On Sunday, we celebrated Oscar’s 3rd birthday and all of Liz’s family who was in town came over to spend time and it was great.  It was really nice to be able to meet them all since not only have I known Liz for 20 years but we have traveled together to India, Thailand, Cambodia, and Turkey together.  Traveling just makes you get to know people in a way that you never would just seeing each other at work or going out to dinner.  Since she’s so much like a sister, I might as well meet her (and my by-proxy) parents. 

And when Ted/Liz/Osk left, it was sad.  Bek had fallen asleep in the car on the way to the airport and didn’t wake up until we were home and his first words when he woke were “Where everybody go?”  When I told him that they had to get on their plane and fly home he responded “My miss dem.  My luh dem.”  I feel the same way sweet boy.  I sure wish they were closer.  But the good news is that we will see them soon in Texas. 





Then it was the first days of school and getting back into the swing of things. It was hard to fill the after school hours before after school activities started. I always thought I would be a parent who didn’t over-schedule the kids and they could pick one thing to do and spend the rest of the time just hanging out. What I didn't take into account is that my kids (well, Rin) might actually want to be scheduled out the wazoo. I finally realized that while I am happier when I can just wake up and figure out what I want to do today, he thrives on action and social situations and wakes up each morning wondering what he is going to get to do and who he will get to see. Who knew this little man would end up in my life?  But I think we’ve I think we might have found something that Rin could really get into- clay class.  He went for the first time yesterday and was just incredibly excited about it.  It is all about dragons and mythical beasts and he gets to do things with his hands.  Right up his alley.   

I love this neighborhood where all the kids exit their houses all at the same time in the morning to walk to school and there are hordes of them heading off.  I overheard this morning Bek telling our across the street neighbor (girl, age 9), “My like you necklace.”  And sweet girl that she is, she responded, “Oh do you?  Well, I can make one just like for you after school today and then we can match.”  What is it about people who are nice to your kids- I would do anything for them just because they bring a little joy to the little boys that I love?  It just melts my heart when people are nice to them.  I feel so fortunate that my kids are so loved.  There are constant knocks on our door (actually shouts through the mail slot most often) from kids who want to play with one or both of them.  Sometimes it’s hard to fight them off when we have another obligation but it’s so nice to know that other kids enjoy being around them.  Because really, I don’t care if my kids are particularly successful in the work world, I just want them to be happy.  Don’t get me wrong- money helps make life easier- but really the most important thing to me is being happy with what and who you have in your life and being truly appreciative of it.  And we are.   

Peter, the sweet man that he is, takes the kids to school most mornings.  It is a godsend as I am too busy making breakfast, serving breakfast, cleaning up breakfast, vacuuming breakfast off the floor, making lunches, making snacks, brushing teeth and hair, helping Bek with going potty and getting dressed, making sure they all have notes about after school activities, making sure they have their sports stuff for after school, making sure they have fruit for Fruity Tuesday… to actually get out the door on time the days that he can’t.  My absolute favorite part of my morning when he takes them is watching those cute boys (all 3 of them) walk off to start their days.  The little guys have their backpacks on, their hair freshly combed and just look so darn cute.  After a quick hug for me, they head off down the sidewalk and there’s usually some “I’m so excited about PE today” or whatever Rin has going on that day or a “Daddy, when my come home my doing hockey!” or whatever it is Bek is excited about that day.  And then they walk their merry way down the sidewalk and I watch my sweet husband and excellent daddy get them safely strapped into the car and off they go.  There’s just something that happens between the front door and them driving away that gets me. 

I sometimes can’t believe that they have a life that takes them away from where I am all day long.  But it’s good.  Because when I get them from school, I get the rundown on their days.  Whether it’s that Rin got a WAVE sticker (showing good moral character) or that he got on yellow today (not so good).  Bek greets me with a running hug and almost always has a picture he’s made for me “Dat me, dat you, dat RahRah, dat Daddy” he explains as he shows it to me.  I just love it. 


And as we walk home Rin keeps trying to walk ahead of me and tell me he’s “Pretending to be a 4th grader who doesn’t have to walk with his parents.”  It happens constantly as this little boy of ours tries to exert his independence.  But one day this show he put on was then followed by him walking down the middle of the street as a car came up behind him and scared the bejesus out of him.  Yup, he’s still a 1st grader.  And yes he’ll be walking with me for the foreseeable future despite his protests.  That testing limits sure is annoying but I know it’s what’s supposed to happen so I try not to let it get to me too often.  


And then one night Carson came in town.  Remember her?  The most awesome friend in the world who literally flew around the world to help bring my baby home?  Yup, she brought her daughter in town and we got together to hang out.  I love that our group of girls is still going strong 22 years after we met each other and 18 years after we scattered to the winds.  And I love that our kids know each other even though we don’t get together often what with all the demands of our busy lives and kids and work and family crises.  All I’m going to say about Carson’s visit was that we had one crazy night.  At the Mayflower.  There were things that had to be put back in their rightful places.  Nuff said.  But it was so so good to see her and I hope it doesn’t take another trip to KStan to get together again.  

And we ended the month with our trip to Texas for Dad's service. We did it up Tejas style with Dickey’s BBQ for lunch at a gas station on the way from the airport to Hawkins, Shiner beer and chicken fried steak for dinner and pecan pie for dessert. Oh yeah.  The tastes of my youth.  All that was missing was some good TexMex.  What I didn’t remember however was that there are about a million donut shops in small town Texas- literally one every mile. It sort of blew my mind as we drove along.  Is that new?  Or do I just not remember?  It has been a while since I've been there.  We didn’t stop at any though.  Rinat’s brain might explode from the sugar content.  I also didn't get my fix of pralines or kolaches but maybe Santa will bring me some for Christmas (hint hint Peter). 



The purpose of this trip was of course to say goodbye to our father but we figured that since both of my brothers and I were going to be there, then we might as well bring the kids too so all of the cousins could be in the same place at the same time.  And it turned a potentially really difficult  trip into- dare I say it- tons of fun.  We rented a house together at Lake Hawkins and the kids played, went fishing, dug in the sand, swam, had races, picnic-ed, and just enjoyed each other’s company.  

















The memorial at the cemetery was nice and low key. People said some very nice things about him and it was good to be able to send him off with some loving words (Did I speak?  No, of course not.  I get nervous speaking in front of more than one person.  Even considering it almost gave me a nervous breakdown.).  Dad worked very hard to make the world a better and happier place.  I would like to think that as we remembered he that he was looking down at his grandchildren, children, siblings and friends and was happy to give us a reason to spend the weekend together on his home soil. It’s been too long since we’ve all been together in this place with these people and I think it was a lovely sendoff for him.
He will be missed.     



 After the service, there was a reception and tables full of Texas food.  All sorts of potluck items I haven’t eaten in probably 20 years.  So good!  Then we all went over to Uncle Kim’s house to hang out afterward and swam and had food round #2.  I just have to say that I love this part of my family. They are just really good people- not a fake one in the bunch.  And although I hate the reason that we got together, I am really happy that there WAS a reason because it was so good to see all of my aunts and uncles and cousins.  I just love them and I had forgotten how much they felt like home and my childhood.  I knew my freshman year of college that I wanted to live on the East Coast but what I didn’t take into account was how far it would be from my Texas home once I had kids and a plethora of obligations that make it so hard to get away.  So I’ll be looking for an excuse to come back sometime.  Family reunion anyone?       





Our cousin Stacey was there among lots of other people that I wish I could see more often and we reminisced about all the plays we would put on and fun we had at the park and playing Capture the Flag during holidays spent together.  It brought back lots of memories and made me want to give those cousin experiences to my kids.  So be forewarned Walt and Ted that I am going to insist that your children entertain us from now on when we get together.  There shall be theatre and costumes and bad Saturday Night Live skits galore.  Prepare yourself.  Maybe at the beach this summer, Walt?          

And while we were in Texas, our adorable new niece arrived via Auntie Ann.  More on that next month when we meet her.  The circle of life, people, the circle of life…

Love to all, -m